5 Sentences From Epictetus To Stop Suffering
Epictetus was a Greek philosopher who for much of his life was a slave in Rome. We do not know with precision the date on which he was released but we do know that he acquired great fame. Perhaps because he focused on the quest for happiness and well-being despite his condition as a slave. It is for this reason that we wanted to take up some of his sentences which helped him in his worst moments and which can help us in turn.
The philosophical current that Epictetus followed was Stoicism. The happiness he was talking about is known as eudemonism . It is achieved through the realization of congruent activities with deep values and also through the establishment of a complete commitment.
Now let’s see what we can learn from his sentences to deal with our suffering.
1. What we say to ourselves is very important
This first sentence of Epictetus to stop suffering tells us about two actions that we often end up doing unconsciously. One is to speak negatively and the other is to build a story out of what we have been through.
For example, after a conversation with a stranger, we might say to ourselves “I behaved like a fool, I answered in an absurd way, I don’t know how to bond with others”. However, what happened to us was not the trigger for our discomfort: it is what we told ourselves about our way of acting.
The important thing is to be aware, to observe the way we speak to ourselves and how we sometimes distort reality. By doing this, we will show more compassion to ourselves.
2. It’s not all up to us
We often suffer and feel bad because there is nothing we can do about what is around us. For example, if we have a friend who is suffering from an abusive relationship but does not see it, we may feel helpless and in pain for that person we love. However, no matter how much energy we are going to waste, we will not be able to avoid what she herself decides to do.
The most important thing, as Epictetus reminds us, is to realize that there are certain circumstances which are beyond our control. We can decide how we are going to act, but what others will do is not up to us. Keeping this in mind and accepting it will allow us to release a good deal of suffering.
3. What people say about us
This third sentence of Epictetus to stop suffering tells us about the importance we give to what others say about us. However, in the face of this, it is important to act with prudence and intelligence. If they speak badly and are right, for example saying that we are lying, we have to correct it. Sometimes what is said about ourselves can help us see some mistakes that we are not aware of.
But what happens when what others say is not true? In this case, we can try to clear up this problem. You also have to know when to stop and when to move on. We don’t have to take everything we hear about us personally. Our bruised attitude can lead us to listen to phrases like “if it bothered him, it’s true”. Sometimes showing a little humor can be a good idea.
4. Opinions and issues are contagious
This other sentence from Epictetus to stop suffering is linked to the people around us. Very often, we do not choose those who will be by our side, for example in the professional field. We must therefore open our eyes and observe whether those around us infect us with their attitudes and thoughts.
Surrounding ourselves with negative people can lead us to observe our surroundings in a pessimistic way, without even realizing it. Taking this fact into account can therefore help us not to be contaminated by the problems and negative attitudes of others.
5. Distance yourself in the face of adversity
The last sentence of Epictetus to stop suffering leaves us a very wise teaching. When we observe other people’s problems, we relativize them or find a clear solution. For example, when faced with a person who is suffering from abuse, we can immediately say “Why doesn’t she walk away and leave her spouse?”.
However, when we ourselves are in this situation, we do not see any simple solution. Something prompts us to stay in this state of suffering. Epictetus therefore invites us to take our distance and try to see what is happening to us as if we were a good friend or a brother / sister. One thing that can help us is to ask ourselves, “if this happened to someone I love, what would be my advice?”. Visualizing this situation and responding without thinking will give us the answer we need to apply.
All these phrases from Epictetus to stop suffering will help us during these times when we see everything in black. Taking a step back and having a few examples in mind can help us see everything more clearly. The suffering, if we stop clinging to it, always ends up going away.
Our thoughts The fact of not wanting to suffer has become an instruction that many follow to the letter without questioning the consequences that it implies …
