7 Keys To Stop Sabotaging Yourself
One of the main problems that hinder our personal development and which, moreover, generates a feeling of unease, is the tendency to undervalue and sabotage ourselves. We put obstacles in our way that prevent us from achieving what we want to achieve.
Believing that you are worse off than others, that you are not competent or capable undermines your self-esteem. Ultimately, it can even have very negative consequences in all areas of your life.
Keep in mind that the person who spends the most time with you is yourself. So if you mistreat yourself, ignore your needs, and just chastise yourself, it will be very difficult for you to feel good and build what you want to achieve.
Stopping sabotaging yourself and setting traps for yourself is the key to moving forward. Here are some elements to achieve this.
1. Open your mind and practice mental flexibility
The first step in stopping sabotaging yourself is to take a correct perspective of yourself. To do this, it is important to assess your level of mental stiffness. Do you really think about all the possibilities that are out there when something happens. Or do you rather see the world through an all or nothing lens?
Realizing that there are several versions of the same event, that there are several possible options and several perspectives, will help you to look at yourself differently. And above all, not to be the judge of yourself.
2. Beware of perfectionism
It’s okay to want to do things right. The problem is when you push that will to the extreme. You cannot be perfect in all areas. It is quite normal to make mistakes. In addition, making mistakes is always an opportunity to learn and it remains the best way to improve.
When we constantly want to do everything right, we risk being too demanding. This inevitably leads to permanent dissatisfaction and a high level of stress. It’s okay to worry, but it’s also dangerous to hang on to your failures.
3. Things are neither black nor white
In life, not everything is black or white, there is a whole range of shades of gray between these two extremes. Therefore, things are not always good or bad. There are different degrees and there are always many variables to consider.
So don’t be discouraged when things don’t seem to have a solution. Life is full of ups and downs. What may seem negative to you one day can ultimately have positive consequences later.
4. Don’t blame yourself for everything that happens
Another important tip to stop sabotaging yourself is to stop blaming yourself for everything. Why are we doing this? Rather, it is better to think of a way to do things differently or to look for solutions. Gradually you will feel better. So learn to look at every situation from a distance.
5. To stop sabotaging yourself, rate yourself
Another way to stop sabotaging yourself is to evaluate yourself objectively and, as much as possible, without judging yourself. To do this, it is best to think carefully about why some things are not going well and what issues you are having at the moment.
Knowing where we are is essential in order to act. However, you don’t just have to focus on what’s wrong. With this analysis done, think about what you want in your life and what you can do to make it happen. That is, set goals and establish an action plan to achieve them.
6. To stop sabotaging yourself, don’t try to control everything
Just as you have to strive to master your level of perfectionism, it’s good that you try not to always be in control of everything. Quite simply because it is not possible. And, even if you believe it, it isn’t anyway.
While this feeling of control can give you peace of mind, constantly trying to control everything also stresses you out and can even make you anxious. It is therefore interesting to focus on meditation, yoga or breathing exercises in order to seek mental serenity.
7. To no longer sabotage yourself, no longer be afraid of making mistakes
This last tip for getting to stop sabotaging yourself is somewhat related to the previous one. Just as it is desirable to try not to always control everything, it is also essential to know that a mistake is often not that bad. So don’t be so hard on yourself. And if you make a mistake, forgive yourself.