Emotional Intelligence In The Elderly
Recent studies tell us that emotional intelligence in the elderly is, on average, quite high. They value and take care of social relationships. They know how to appreciate the present and regulate their emotions to adjust to each moment. In addition, they assess their environment and what is happening to them in a more positive way. In this way, they have a more tranquil and optimistic view of their reality.
It is possible that some people are surprised by the results of this work carried out by the University of Texas and the University of California at Berkeley. We still have a negative view of the elderly and the aging process today. We associate the passing of time with physical decline, decreased cognitive ability and, irreparably, a lack of happiness, low motivation, and social and emotional isolation. In other words, we associate it with losses. Especially at losses.
It is clear that the fact of arriving at the autumn of life in good health is a very important plus to face this stage. The fewer limitations we have, the more possibilities we will know. It is also evident that the personality and circumstances of each play a role in adopting a perspective on life. The work just discussed has shown that the ability to deal with emotions and recognize one’s own feelings (as well as those of others) generally improves from the age of 60.
We are not talking about a normative thing. That’s not to say that emotional intelligence improves in everyone over time. Experience allows many people to cope well with emotional processes. It also directs them towards the prioritization of an essential thing: social relations.
Emotional intelligence in the elderly
Being old, being over 60 does not mean loneliness, dissatisfaction and decline. At least not for almost 10 years. Life expectancy is already over 80 years old: we could therefore say that being 60 would be like living a second youth. The 70 years, for their part, would represent a quiet maturity. So today we can all clearly see something obvious: the elderly are, in general, incredibly active.
They participate in endless dynamics in their communities, travel, benefit from their friends… They take care of their grandchildren and represent this constant and almost indispensable support for their children… Therefore, and even if many of these people have to often facing illness or the emptiness of some loss, a good majority of them display effective emotional skills.
But how do they do it? The bodily deterioration is there, as are the health problems. Or the economic and social problems. So how do they manage to maintain such a high level of emotional and emotional well-being? The keys are revealed to us in the Oxford University Journal of Gerontology. These are the following.
Theories that would explain the increase in emotional intelligence in old age
Let’s take a look at some hypotheses that, when put together, could explain the feeling of fullness that many older people exude:
- Emotional intelligence is explained by the theory of socio-emotional selectivity. There comes a time when we realize that the quota of life is running out. This idea, this personal and existential reality causes us to focus our attention on emotionally rewarding experiences. We don’t care about future rewards. We want to enjoy well-being, here and now, because long-term plans make less and less sense.
- The theory of dynamic integration, on the other hand, gives us a different idea. As we age, we gradually realize how much our physical and cognitive capacities are reduced. We are not as agile as before. We live by being conditioned by this pain in the hips, by our diabetes, by osteoarthritis… Faced with these realities which cannot be controlled, the elderly chooses to develop positive emotions. By doing this, she can achieve balance and happiness. Ultimately, we can control our emotions.
- The emotional intelligence of older people is also orchestrated by their experience. The years have taught them to better control certain emotional situations. They understand their process, regulate themselves better and know how to connect to the needs of others.
- Another factor that is as interesting as it is revealing is the famous “positivity effect”. Some people, after taking stock of their life or their experiences, decide to keep only the rewarding things. This point of view, this personal filter pushes them to see the positive side of things. They can thus build quality relationships and evaluate everything with a more optimistic perspective.
Promote emotionally intelligent and positive maturity
Good emotional intelligence in older people translates into a better quality of life. What is more, health indicators are also linked to this factor. Good management of our emotional world reduces stress or depression. It also improves all these daily challenges that adults have to face: losses, illnesses, addiction …
Remember that emotional intelligence is not a normative thing. It does not appear over the years. We don’t all know what it is. And, if we know it, we don’t always apply the best strategies effectively. Therefore, an interesting strategy would be to apply, in each community, an emotional intelligence program aimed at healthy elderly people without cognitive decline.
It would be a question of giving shape to multi-disciplinary programs which would help each person starting from his personal reality. Advanced age is sometimes accompanied by personal crises. Wear and tear, lack of motivation and disillusionment are often present. Developing dimensions such as empathy, emotional regulation or social skills would significantly promote the aging process.
Let us consider emotional intelligence in the elderly – and the youngest – as a key to good health, as a motor for a more dynamic third age, better integrated into society and, of course, happier. We cannot forget that our life expectancy is increasing more and more. We therefore have the right to take full advantage of it and to benefit from the best resources.
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