How To Help An Elderly Person Who Is Sad
Sadness is part of life and no one escapes it. However, there are stages in which it floods us more easily. One of them is that of the third age, that moment when we begin to see youth as a distant horizon which gradually recedes. Many people wonder how to help an elderly person who is sad and feels trapped in this recurring emotion.
There are several reasons for this sadness at this time of life. Like in adolescence, the body suddenly changes and it is out of our control. The relationship with the family and the social environment is also changing. Many stop working during this stage, and others have to deal with the death of their spouses, friends and dreams that are unlikely to come true again.
Helping an elderly person who is sad is not as complicated an intervention as you might think. It is true that the physical limitations are greater, which limits the range of possibilities. However, the margin is normally large and it is possible to find alternatives, plans and projects which may excite the person.
Risk factors for depression
The best way to help an older person who may be suffering from depression is to know their level of vulnerability and to pay attention to these factors that can increase their risk of experiencing symptoms. We must keep in mind that at this point in life losses are more frequent and gains more exceptional, unlike in childhood.
In addition, there are other circumstances which could contribute to increasing the risk of suffering from depression during this stage of life. Here are the main causes:
- Health status. If there are health problems, and especially if they are chronic, the risk of depression becomes greater. Especially in cases where degenerative diseases are present or when the person experiences frequent physical pain.
- The personality. A person who is insecure or has low self-esteem is more likely to get carried away by sadness at this time in their life.
- The socio-economic condition. Economic dependence or lack of resources during this stage generates a greater risk.
- To live alone.
- Have a weak or no social network.
By being aware of these risk factors, we can discern the first clues that tell us how to help an elderly person who is sad. Therefore, at first, the main thing is to assess these risk factors, talk about them with the affected person and look for ways so that they do not turn into depression.
Helping an elderly person who is sad
Helping an elderly person who is sad does not mean taking charge of their sadness. A depressed person doesn’t need to be “adopted” let alone pityed. A depressed person needs motivation, affection, companionship and support. And, above all, respect. You have to accept your moments, your decisions, your preferences. By advising her, motivating her and letting her make her own decisions. That way, the changes that happen will be more likely to last.
Help, in addition to being more effective when it is intelligent and person-friendly, is also more positive when it comes from honesty and from the heart. When we do it because the person matters to us and not so that they stop bothering us.
Good, but what can you do to help an older person who is not feeling well emotionally? Here are some specific measures:
- Try to get her to question her negative thoughts; her state of mind already prompts her to do the same with her positive thoughts. Do it with affection. If she tells you that she feels like she can’t do something right anymore, ask if there is anything you could do to change that. If she tells you that nothing interests her, let her speak freely about her reasons, without confronting them.
- Don’t let her sit idly by. Help her find small, productive tasks that will make her feel useful.
- Develop positive feelings. Help her remember good times, great successes, etc. Ask him for his opinion and let him know that you value his wisdom and experience. Let him know that his opinion matters to you.
- Give her stimuli to find rewarding activities, no matter how small. A morning walk, reading, gardening, any activity is positive.
- Help her put a routine in place. Sadness and depression often cause a person to stay in bed or spend their time in front of the television. We can sit down with her and rearrange her day. We can propose things but we must not forget that it is she who must have the last word. If not, we will have to do constant supervisory work for her to perform these tasks.
Knowing how to age is a process in which there are many emotionally complicated moments. We learn a lot when we discover that supporting these more vulnerable people is also a way to make us feel better. To give meaning to our life and to the person that we are.
* Sorting edit note: Sadness, in its strictest sense, is an emotion and therefore cannot last much over time. In this article, when we use the term “sadness” we are referring more to a state in which melancholy, hopelessness and sadness predominate.
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