Honoring The Memory Of A Loved One
In people who are grieving over the death of a loved one, we can identify a large amount of emotions. Shock, rage, guilt and deep sadness. We can then ask ourselves the following question: in a situation of mourning, how to preserve the memory of a loved one?
In the cartoon Up there, we see how Carl Friedricksen deals with the passing of his wife, Ellie. Full of sadness, Carl regrets not having succeeded in achieving a dream they shared: to see Heaven Falls.
Carl is tormented by the pain after the death of the person he loved most in his life. The death of his wife Ellie has turned him into a taciturn and cranky man. The mourning has become stronger than him.
After a loss
Grieving is a natural response to loss. We are talking about an emotional pain that we have to work through despite the threat or the pain it contains.
When analyzing a grieving process, it is important to remember that each process is different. It is marked by the loss but also by the circumstances of the latter and by the person who died. The best place to start for people who want to help is therefore to avoid comparisons with personal experiences.
On the other hand, one attitude that will never help the other is to look down on this loss. It is the one who goes through mourning who appreciates the importance of the loss. And who has to decide how he wants to integrate this absence into his life story.
How to honor the memory of a loved one
In the film Up there , Friedricksen’s character finds a creative way to deal with his grief. As a last gift to his deceased wife, he decides to take the trip they both dreamed of. Very quickly, he sets up a strategy to take their home to Heaven Falls. A place Ellie always wanted to visit. Only in this way can Carl come to terms with the death of his wife. By honoring his memory.
There are many ways to go through grief. We are therefore going to suggest several ways to honor the memory of a loved one.
Make a donation or carry out a charitable action on behalf of the loved one
We often want to help but don’t know how. When grieving, many people have found that helping others makes them feel better. So, if you think it’s a good idea, pick a task that would make you feel useful. A task that would be in tune with the interests of the person who left. This way, your actions will be like a funeral for the deceased.
Let your emotions breathe
Try to make your emotions breathe. Avoid keeping them to yourself, asphyxiating them because you will end up not being able to bear them anymore. Tell yourself that emotional outbursts are characterized by a lack of control. They could therefore hurt the people around you and hurt yourself.
It is important to recognize our emotions and to externalize them. One way to externalize feelings, for example, is to write. It is also possible to draw or keep a dialog open.
Surround yourself with love
In times of grief and loss, many people fall into a state of depression. They unwittingly plunge into a state characterized by despair, apathy and sadness.
Depression leads to different symptoms: drowsiness, mood swings, and a tendency to be alone. Loneliness is often important and beneficial: it allows a person to have their space to think. However, in the case of bereavement, it can be very harmful. Loneliness in depression can lead to developing feelings of helplessness. And abandonment.
Action leads to healing
Several experts explain that the grieving process has different stages: negation, rage, depression and acceptance. Even though some people experience grief as a process with stages, grieving to honor the memory of a loved one does not happen that way.
People go through good days and bad days. Consider being kind to yourself during this time of grieving. You don’t have to give up hope if you wake up very badly one morning when you thought you were on your way.
Here are some suggestions for dealing with grief. The first is to organize oneself and involves responsibilities which, for example, can arise from a death. Making a list of pending tasks will help you stay focused and not despair.
The second suggestion is related to communication with our body and food. Eating a healthy diet will help you feel better about your body. The third suggestion is to exercise regularly. As you exercise, you will release hormones that will make you feel better.
Manage grief at your own pace
There is one thing you need to remember throughout the grieving process: this is not a race. It’s not about competing with others to see who feels the best first. Grieving takes time.
Don’t hurry. Each person experiences this process in their own way. Not every way of dealing with grief may work for you. See this episode as an opportunity to re-discover yourself. Find out what is the best way to integrate this loss into your life.
Our thoughts We have all gone through a grieving process at some point. A series of stages which occur one after the other and which allow us …
