My First Consultation With The Psychologist
I never thought I would one day need to see a psychologist. Nor had I tried to find out what the work of psychologists consisted of, or what good therapy could offer me. But, one day, all that changed. I started to feel that something was wrong inside me and I couldn’t quite explain it to myself.
I started to lose my motivation and my joy. The things I adored left me completely indifferent. It was more and more difficult for me to get out of bed, to get out of the house, even though I felt better when I left. I wanted it, but I couldn’t. It was a strange feeling, which made me think that something was wrong with my mental health.
Since time passed and nothing changed or improved in me, I motivated myself to go see a psychologist. I didn’t know what to expect, didn’t know what to say or how to start when I walked into his office. I was very nervous and, at the same time, reluctant. Now that I know the results, I can tell you that it was very useful to me and it did not turn out the way I expected. It was different.
A psychologist will not tell you what you want to hear: they will tell you the truth, even if it hurts
The first time I went to a psychological consultation, the doctor started by asking me why I asked for help. Not being able to explain it scared me a bit. Like I said earlier, I just felt bad. But I was unable to find the reasons, I was unable to put words to this discomfort. And, contrary to what I might have thought, talking with the psychologist seemed very easy.
He managed to help me put words to my discomfort, I didn’t feel alone or helpless, and he didn’t worship me by just telling me this. that I wanted to hear. He simply taught me to analyze and work on what was wrong, to be aware of my flaws but also of my potential.
We weren’t just talking. From the start, from the first visit, we agreed on a goal: to leave behind the feeling of unease that had prompted me to consult a health professional. This is perhaps the most difficult part of therapy because you are not a passive entity who receives a magical solution to your problems; on the contrary, you realize that these can change, evolve or disappear depending on the point of view from which you observe them and depending on what you do with them, directly or indirectly.
This is when you realize that there is no such thing as magic through words. Change takes work, sometimes you have to do a lot more than endure the pain that prompted you to consult. Even when you are in the middle of the process, you may find that your idea of yourself changes and this scares you, but the goal is not to feel good in the short term – you have to work. to achieve change that makes you feel good in the long run.
A good psychologist will help you let go of guilt and force you to take responsibility for your discomfort.
Once therapy is initiated and changes set in motion, not everything just happens. Very often, since I was already aware of my problems, I stubbornly labeled them. With labels that did not always correspond to what my / my psychologist told me.
It made me lose confidence because I don’t think anyone but ourselves can get to know each other better. But then I realized that, just as no one can know me as well as I do, I specialized in knowing my springs and mental mechanisms, as did my psychologist. It was something quite simple, which escaped me at first glance but which hides another reality. The one that says you can be a master at the art of self-deception.
This self-deception that pushes us to be too cruel or too kind to ourselves and which robs us of a clear vision of our own reality. Which very often makes us plunge into guilt because of how we feel, who we are, or simply because we feel bad.
But therapy works like a mirror. It teaches you to see yourself as you are and not as you would like to see yourself. It also doesn’t show you who you blame yourself for being. My first consultation in a psychological practice helped me to let go of the guilt I felt for not having put all my energy into the challenges that I had not been able to meet. She helped me to take responsibility for this discomfort that was born from this guilt.
So, for all these reasons, my first consultation was worth it. Now, I am stronger, I have more resources and my view of the world is more adjusted. I now know that I am not perfect, I even took a liking to these imperfections which, before that, only caused me frustration. I can face life, I can fail, but all of this doesn’t make me weak – it strengthens my motivation to grow and move forward.
It is true that I am still afraid, but these fears no longer seep into my thoughts and no longer imprison me. They no longer do what they want with me because I now have enough foothold to untie the knots that held me back in the past.
Our thoughts “I don’t need to go to the psychologist, I’m not crazy.” How many times have we heard this phrase in a conversation …
