Be Kind To Yourself!
It would seem that we are the worst judges of ourselves, and even the worst executioners! We would take care of others even better than ourselves.
Maybe we demand too much of ourselves, don’t forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and it costs us a lot to love ourselves.
It is therefore essential to learn to love, respect and accept ourselves as we are, as we do towards the people around us. By working on yourself first, it is easier to tackle our relationships with others afterwards.
Some may say that they are very demanding of themselves not to stand still or because they need limits to keep moving forward.
On the other hand, it is not good to constantly rehash what we have done wrong or what we could improve. We should start by being less strict with ourselves and allowing ourselves to make mistakes from time to time.
We want to show others that we are strong, determined and courageous, like a superhero or a wonderful woman. We prefer to hide our fears, our doubts and the fact that we are not that happy.
This mask that we wear does not help us, because when the moment comes when we find ourselves alone, we become the most unfair and harsh people on the planet and we do not accept any mistakes on our part.
How to become tender to ourselves again?
Saying to oneself “I love myself” is not synonymous with narcissism, but with acceptance of oneself, as one is. Here are some tips that can help you be more kind to yourself:
1. Assume that you were wrong. No one is perfect and no one knows everything about everything. You make mistakes just like everyone else because you are human. Relativize, don’t make a mountain of these mistakes, put them in perspective.
If any of your gestures or words don’t suit you, pay more attention to them next time, analyze the situation, and figure out how you might resolve it.
What if a friend or family member made the same mistake? Convince yourself that the world will not stop spinning, and that it is not the end of the world if you were wrong.
2. Don’t ignore the pain, sadness, fear, suffering, hopelessness, depression… that is, all the pain you feel.
There are times when you want to hide from others, but there are times when you have to face your feelings and emotions.
You are able to stand your best friend feeling bad or your other half having a bad time, but you cannot say to yourself “today I feel sad” or “I am depressed” because you wish you everything. price take that feeling away, hide it and not have to deal with it. However, know that this only makes matters worse.
3. Treat yourself the same as you would your loved ones : imagine you are in the kitchen with your son and he wants to help you set the table.
He takes a drink but drops it to the ground and it shatters into a thousand pieces. What would you say to him? If he has cut himself or starts to cry, you would console him, tell him that he did not do it on purpose and that this is a mistake that anyone could commit.
Now, what if, instead of your son, you yourself broke that glass into a thousand pieces? I’m sure your first reaction would be to think that you are incapable and that you never do anything right.
Compare these two situations and imagine how the child would feel if you told him the same thing as you said to yourself or if you were more understanding.
4. Just because you’re in a bad time doesn’t mean that bad luck will never go away. We all have times that we want to forget, that hurt us, when nothing goes as planned, and we feel like we have our minds all muddled up.
Beyond these bad, unfortunate, and adversarial things is the possibility of coming out brilliantly, and winning a battle against these negative waves.
There will always be great things to make up for the worst times of our lives. Stop for a few minutes to think about those things for which you are grateful… You will find that there are way more than you thought!
Don’t be your own worst enemy. Become your ally and your companion.
