Set A Good Example For Children, The Best Gift You Can Give Them
Children, when they are small, are innocent beings who will rarely question what their parents say or do. For them, what their reference figures do is the example to follow : it is therefore obvious that they will tend to imitate them.
Very often, as parents, we reprimand our children’s conduct in a very negative way; we don’t allow them to be wrong and our judgments end up hurting their self-esteem.
The problem is, we don’t always respect what we tell them to do and kids quickly realize this. Telling them to be organized, not to lie and not to raise your voice makes no sense if we are the first not to do so. Thousands of words and verbal teachings will be of no use if we do not lead by example.
We must realize that we are the mirror in which the children are reflected, their guide, their reference. If we are not doing well emotionally, our emotions will become theirs and our behavior will be projected onto them. Therefore, as adults, although it is obvious that we have the right to fail, we must make an effort to develop our self-control and self-discipline, especially in front of our children.
Through actions serving as examples, they will learn and correctly apprehend everything that we seek to transmit to them.
Some good examples for our children
Teach them to tell the truth
We believe that it is enough to scold our children when they lie but it is not. Children imitate their parents and, let’s be honest, how many times have they caught us telling a lie, no matter how small? Quite often we lie to them directly and they end up realizing it, so the message being conveyed is that lying is a normal thing that good people do because parents did.
There is no point in trying to instill sincerity in our children if we are the first to lie.
Teach them to listen
Very often you have tried the impossible to get your child to calm down and listen to you, but how many times have you actually listened to them? How many times have you not given him your attention when he wanted to tell you something that happened to him at school or sing his favorite song to you?
It is impossible to get your children’s attention if sometimes when you are busy you are not listening to them yourself. Ideally, if you can’t take a break to deal with them, is to tell them – sincerely – that you can’t listen to them right away, but you can do it in a few minutes.
Teach them to speak quietly
How many times have we told our children not to scream when we ourselves don’t stop screaming? If we want them to speak quietly and in a pleasant way, we need to set an example for them. Certainly our patience has limits, but as adults and parents we must make an effort to be rational and not let ourselves be ruled by our emotions. If we do this frequently, our children will learn eventually.
Teach them to respect the standards
Are you traveling at more than 120km / h on the highway? Do you sometimes double-park? Are you stealing pens from your desk? If so, you are not teaching your children to respect the standards because you are the first to break them. You will therefore have great difficulty in making them respect the standards of the house: they will not understand why you can transgress them and not them.
Teach them how to have productive hobbies
If you want your kids to read, you have to be the first to read. If you don’t want them to spend as much time in front of the TV or smartphone, you should consider stepping away from these devices. Your passions will (with great probability) be their passions. So, if the ones you have now aren’t the most beneficial, maybe it’s time to change them and get your kids to see you doing other things. This change will be good for everyone.
Teach them to be tolerant of frustration
This point is very important. If you are one of those parents who drown in a glass of water, your children will inevitably be. It is vital to help your children tolerate the vicissitudes of life, personal mistakes or those of others, and ultimately adversity and setbacks. It is not about continually telling them or being rigid with them; on the contrary, they must observe your way of being, of seeking solutions, of accepting what cannot be changed and of being emotionally stable.
These are just a few examples of things you can teach your children. In truth, there is an infinity of them. The key lies in the awareness of being their main role model, at least until adolescence. Therefore, they will duplicate whatever we do. Think about what you don’t like about yourself and start changing that point – it will be good for you and your kids.
